The Aging Starseed

It has come to my attention that many starseeds choose a third density life simply for the compelling adventure of living a long life in a physical human body, far into old age and all the hurdles and challenges that can bring, all those changes and cycles a material body goes through with age and decline.

What often happens as one gets into the more advanced stages of life as the body weakens, the star being wants out. Hey I didn’t sign up for this - let me out of here- I changed my mind! Old age is hard, the aching body, the forgetfulness, the disappointment, forced to give up so many things she loved and the sadness that brings. This stage of life can continue for awhile or sometimes for the rest of the life.

However, with many starseeds, after they grieve the loss of youth and beauty, an interesting thing begins to happen. As she, or he, becomes somewhat resigned to the way things are, an unexpected transformation begins to occur. As the body forces them to slow their pace and expectations, the person begins to notice the world around them changing, altering to accommodate their new condition.

For example, the elderly woman who in her younger days spent most of her years working and taking care of kids and a husband, trucking kids around to dance classes and soccer games, making lunches, driving them to and from school, with hardly any time to herself and feels lucky if she can squeeze in a quick run before work. How many times has she heard herself say, I’ll do that when I retire?

Now here she is, that same energetic attractive woman, but now in her 70s or 80s. Now instead of running through the park, she walks slowly and carefully over the same terrain, yet what took her 10 minutes now takes her an hour or more. Now as she walks the trail around the lake, things she never noticed before are more obvious. Today she notices a spectacular yellow butterfly drinking nectar from a bright red flower, a flower she would never have noticed before, as she jogged past, now becomes the center of her attention and a thought runs through her mind that she doesn’t ever remember seeing a butterfly that color or a flower that red. All those things that remained irrelevant or invisible to her on her early morning run, thinking only of getting to work on time, now were revealing themselves in front of her.

How many thousands of times had she run past the giant Doug Fir tree at the head of the north trail? Today, at her unhurried pace, her gaze is suddenly drawn to a quick movement about 6 feet from the base of the tree and she slows further to watch the little downey woodpecker skittling its way around and around the massive trunk, and she finds herself smiling at the comical rapid movements. She never before noticed the deep groves in the rutted bark and paused to watch the little boxelder bugs crawling in and out of the many holes on the surface. She smells the musty sweetness of the needles lying at the base of the tree and for the first time pauses long enough to allow her gaze to follow the entire length of the huge tree from base to top and wonders at the age and life of this great old entity, contemplating what it must have seen from the earliest moments as a sprouted seedling to this moment, her moment, her now and the bond that is beginning to grow within her for the innate wisdom housed in its majestic frame. Does it think or does it just know? Does it ever get bored or is life so harmonious that all it sees is the perfection of this moment. Her hand reaches out running her palm over the grooves and allowing the fingers to explore the knobby depths of the hollows and somehow knows she made a lifelong friend and without any of the ego or effort that usually happens when humans meet, but merely with the curiosity of the present.

This is what can happen when one releases the focus on self and settles it on another. Ego takes a back seat to the wonder of nature when the body slows and pauses long enough to perceive its surroundings and the deeper senses can take over - instantly there are birds singing, the sun is brighter, the sky a deeper blue, the grass softer underfoot. She becomes aware that the joint aches have lessened, the breeze feels warmer on her neck, her spine straightens, shoulders relax ...and perhaps in that extraordinary moment she is young again - not because she tried, but because she allowed the moment to be what it is. She let go of resistance to the many frustrations and disappointments of loss, the loss of youth and the resistance that brings to the physical.

The second that resistance was lifted, harmony returned and everything again made sense and a new life unfolded directly in front of her. That one seemingly unimportant, insignificant moment brought a new melody to her senses. It was then that a curious vision came into her mind, something she had not thought of for years and she whispered to her tall friend, hmmm maybe I’ll see if I can dig out that set of oils from the back of the closet. As she turned back toward the house a feeling of gratitude filled her heart and she was aware of how much lighter her body felt and wondered if the clouds had just parted or the sun just got brighter. Hmm, is that possible? Maybe... I know for myself, this began happening a few years ago and I now find my most memorable or distinctive moments are those spent in solitary contemplation, while walking or working on a task or hobby. This aging, this slowing or weakening of the physical seems to give way to a greater capacity and appreciation of the nature of creation itself, allowing for a deeper insight into that which lies beyond the duty and function of human agreement and obligation - as if being given permission to step out of external responsibility and into the world of curiosity and inspiration. It’s not that the days of driving kids around isn’t important, it is, but from my wider perspective, it would sure be a shame to get so caught up in that, as life itself, that you would never be able to move out of that frantic pace and into the peace that exists beyond it.

That field of clover you once ran through with your dog, you may now instead, stand in the middle of, now able to see things you may have not ever even known were there before. Now, standing still in the center of the field the senses become alive - suddenly there’s a brand new world, an entire community of smells and sounds and colors - the bright pink blossoms, the masses of busy insects, the dampness of the group and fragrance of the blooms, the rustling of some little critter scouting out dinner ... and again the mind becomes alive with wonder and you’ve just become a part of an entire realm of existence that excites and expands the essence of who you are ...and you’ll never again be just that old man or old woman. You are it all, the entirety of life itself and maybe for the first time, you begin to know and really recognize who you are.